Females Dare Love Thyself (Part TWO of TWO)
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_Art by EUGENE DELACROIX
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Give It Up For
Masturbation
By Julie Bogart
_______July 26th, 2009
Sirens website
SIRENSMAG.COM
____Links are in GREEN
____Part TWO of TWO
It’s not just for the single ladies.
Though many assume that
masturbation is for the unattached,
Fulbright assures women:
“There’s nothing wrong
with self-pleasuring while
in a relationship.
A number feel that their
pleasure should be dependent
upon their partner and don’t
give themselves permission
or see the need for it.”
But the time you spend alone
in the bedroom will improve
the bedroom time you spend
with your partner.
It promotes self-confidence.
“Masturbation is self-love,”
says Buehler.
“It’s a wonderful way to learn
that you can take care of yourself.”
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_-Art by EVAN FITZGERALD
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Getting Down to Business
While every woman
should masturbate,
the ways to go about it
vary from woman to woman—
different strokes (literally)
for different folks.
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__-_Art by PAUL HERMAN
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Vibrators vs. hands-on love.
For many women,
using a vibrator is a sure-fire
way to get the job done.
In fact,
if a woman is having difficulty
climaxing for any set of reasons—
physical or emotional—
sex therapists often recommend
the use of a vibrator as a first
step toward finding pleasure.
Sexologist Ava Cadell
endorses the We-Vibe,
which stimulates the clitoris
and G-spot simultaneously,
similar to the much-hyped Rabbit.
“Visit an adult toy store
and see what interests you,”
she advises.
“Pick a size and shape that
you feel most comfortable with,
and try using the toy
in different positions.”
These days you can even get
a vibrator application for your
iPod or iPhone—seriously.
“A vibrator with different
speeds may be useful”,
adds Schwartz,
“since sensitivity changes
during sexual excitement,
and each person has a different
tolerance level related to stimulation.”
Your hands can work just as well,
if not better.
“I tend to think fingers
are better because a woman
can find out how she likes
more delicate areas to be touched,
like the inner and outer labia,”
Buehler says.
“She can also easily explore
her G-spot with her fingers.”
Judy Kuriansky,
sex therapist and author of
offers other creative suggestions:
“Lift you legs up
under the shower,
rub a pillow between your legs,
hump the side of the couch,
go horseback riding or
sit on anything that vibrates.”
There’s no need to limit yourself,
so do what works best for you—
you’ll know it when you find it.
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_-“Red Nude” by Martina Shapiro
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Set the mood.
Once you’ve established your method,
help yourself along with the
right ambiance.
Just as you wouldn’t want
to have sex with CNN blaring
in the background,
treat yourself to a similar
dose of romance.
Draw a bath.
Watch one of your
favorite sex scenes.
Get yourself revved up before
you turn on the vibrator.
Even if we’re not yet
ready to talk about it,
there’s no good reason
why 21st-century women
shouldn’t be steaming the oyster …
ugh,
we need to work on
our euphemisms though.
Says Cadell,
“You never need to make
excuses about why you do it.
It is a gift you have
just for yourself.”
Who do you think female
masturbation is still such
a taboo subject?
Has this social silencing
influenced your relationship with,
well,
yourself?
Julie Bogart is a freelance
writer living in Brighton, Mass.
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_Art by ARTHUR BRAGINSKY
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______________________________________________________
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_Art by JOANNA TOKARCZYK
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.“TEMPTATION” by CHEKIROV
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