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“I Was Tortured By The Pygmy Love Queen”!


By Jeremy Lovell Reuters – Friday, March 28 01:04 am


LONDON (Reuters) – Self-help manual

“If You Want Closure in Your Relationship,

Start With Your Legs”

won this year’s oddest book title competition,

 The Bookseller trade magazine said on Friday.


The book took an impressive one-third

of the 8,500 votes cast online in The Bookseller’s

30th annual competition.


Runner up

“I was Tortured By the Pygmy Love Queen”,

the story of a fictitious World War Two pilot

 forced to bale out over the jungle,

polled a distant 20 percent.


“‘If You Want Closure’, makes redundant

an entire genre of self-help tomes.

So effective is the title that you don’t even

need to read the book itself,”

said the magazine’s deputy editor Joel Rickett.


The winner beat stiff competition

from other shortlisted titles including

the somewhat niche “Cheese Problems Solved

and “How to Write a How to Write Book

and the rather provocative

Are Women Human?

And Other International Dialogues“.


The annual competition was launched in 1978

at the Frankfurt Book Fair when it was won

by the memorably titled

Proceedings of the Second International

Workshop on Nude Mice“.


Since then, with the exceptions of 1987 and 1991

when no award was granted due,

according to Rickett, to a lack of oddness,

the weird and wonderful titles have

flowed thick and fast with some

eyebrow raising winners.


Joy of Chickens” took the 1980 title,

with “The Theory of Lengthwise Rolling

in 1983,

Lesbian Sadomasochism Safety Manual

in 1990, “Living with Crazy Buttocks

in 2002 and “Bombproof Your Horse”

in 2004 are but a sample.


However, the 1997 winner

Joy of Sex: Pocket Edition

does stand out among the glittering array,

and in September this year the public

will be asked to vote for the oddest

of all the winners.


“That and ‘Nude Mice’ probably remain

among the weirdest, but it is a strong

competition,” said Rickett.


“And the quality of weirdness

does seem to be improving in part

as technology allows greater access

to publishing. Certainly we are getting

more titles coming forward,”

he added.

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