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Hexopus captured! Do not panic!


British marine experts have found

what they claim is a world first.

A six-legged octopus,

or “hexapus,” has been captured alive,

 both CHINA VIEW and Bretbart are reporting March 3rd.

The hexaous, which has two limbs fewer than a normal octopus,

is believed to be the result of a birth defect rather than an accident,

say his keepers at the Blackpool Sea Life Centre in northwest England.

(No doubt massive amounts or radiation from Atom bomb

testing in the 50’s created this freak of nature that could have

consumed Los Angeles or Tokyo if the hexaous had a few more

years to grow to full size.)

“We’ve scoured the Internet and talked to lots of other

aquariums and no-one has ever heard of another case

of a six-legged octopus,” said supervisor Carey Duckhouse.

 (No one still alive remembers another hexaous, anyway.

How very convenient.)

Henry was discovered in a lobster pot off the north Wales

coast two weeks ago, and was one of eight creatures

that Sea Life staff picked up from a local marine zoo there —

where staff hadn’t noticed his missing legs.

It was only when he attached himself to the inside

of a glass tank that Sea Life staff noticed he was two limbs

short of a full set.

Octopuses are renowned for having three hearts and blue blood,

 but not usually six legs.

“He’s a lovely little thing,”

said a spokeswoman,

adding that he will go on display to the public later this week.

(If the whole staff does not turn up dead

with suction cup marks all over their shriveled bodies

and the atomic mutation Henry The Hexapus

escapes into the dark sea to feed and grow in the murky depths

until the time is right to again strike at mankind in revenge

for it’s abuse of the seas and the power of the Atom.)

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